They decided to do a routine based upon Britney Spear’s Hit me Baby song (what decade is this again? anyways). So at the end they lift up their skirts to show their school spirit.

to end what they called “an awful season” with a provocative cheer routine capped off with a flash of their derrieres and spell out the school’s nickname, “Indians.”

Video of one of the cheerleaders can be found here. She says they were “trying to get red hole energized” (about 5:07 counting down). Indeed.

Wish I could’ve been there. Red holes always energize me. If you know what I mean!

British citizens Rowan Trezise, 33, and Richie Trezise, 35, are living apart as she tries desperately to shed the pounds needed to comply with New Zealand guidelines that immigrants maintain a healthy BMI, or body mass index.

Why would a country care if a fat chick lived there or not? Will she tip the continent or something? Of course not!

The regulations were supposedly put into place for budget reasons. The country’s health care system cannot afford to open its doors to overweight immigrants, a spokesman for New Zealand’s Fight the Obesity Epidemic explained to the Daily Mail.

Freedom (to live where you want) is not possible when your health is bought and paid for by others. In a world where each person pays their own way through life (what a novel concept!) people would be able to live where they wanted - as long as they chose to get their legally.

But when your neighbor is paying taxes to feed you, pay your medical bills, and pay for everyone else’s bills, your freedoms are taken from you.

Freedom. Socialism. Oil. Water.

Well, all you have to do is look no further than your local craigslist. It seems that prostitution is quite the booming business - and no a site that requires virtually no account verification, has a section designed for intimate encounters, is free to post on, and carries no transaction fees. I’m shocked, no make that shocked that the sex industry would latch onto this site in order to rent women to the first avaliable guy.

What’s even more alarming is that the cops are apparently stunned by this recent turn of events.

Now that many prostitutes are taking their business to cyberspace, the veil of virtual anonymity has made it much more difficult for police to arrest them.

For the record, I am really only opposed to prostitution on economic grounds - I believe that most women who engage in the activity are either a prisoner to their drugs or their pimps. I have no real qualms with it on a moral ground. If you can afford to keep your business in your house, don’t diminish the property values around you, bring crime/drugs to the neighborhood, etc; I say more power to you.

Charging cash for sex (for single women) is just one notch below being single anyways. Right?

FDLE records show Cowal is a registered sex offender and has a record of arrests for alleged offenses beginning in 1993, ranging from burglary, lewd and lascivious or indecent assault upon a child, trespass, aggravated assault, driving under the influence, probation violation and high-speed fleeing from law enforcement. He was sentenced to 23 months in prison between 1993 and 2000.

While the jackpot was $14 million, he opted to take all the winnings at once, totalling $8 million before taxes. What does Cowal tend to do with the money?

We aren’t sure, but buying a van … and a puppy are probably on the top of his list. Of course.

It is estimated that at halftime of the Super Bowl, across the United States 90 million people will flush about 350 million gallons (1.3 billion litres) of water down the toilet at the same time.

That’s a lot of flushin’ goin on. What’s the over/under on this, though? I want to get some sweet gambling action here. The flush and the commercials are usually more interesting than the game itself anyways. Even Federline is getting into it this year.  I think most the action will happen after people see his face on their TV sets.

The story makes an interesting comparison too:

It is equivalent to the amount of water that flows over Niagara Falls every 39 minutes.

That’s a nice thought. All those logs going over Niagra Falls. One wonders why anyone would visit that place. Isn’t there possibly a better comparison. Let’s say; that’s still less crap than Washington spits out in a single session of Congress.

On the plates in front of them was a serving of agnolotti pasta and in the middle a meatball made with oil Evaristti removed from his body in a liposuction procedure last year.

“The question of whether or not to eat human flesh is more important than the result,” he said, explaining the point of his creation.

“You are not a cannibal if you eat art,” he added.

Whew! I’m glad I won’t be a cannibal if I buy 10 of those for $4,000 and cook them up for dinner tonight. I’ll have some solice in that. Wonder what I’ll make the sauce out of though. I’m partial to alfredo sauce. Anyone got ideas for me?

Brings a whole new level of comedy to this SNL skit:

A billboard advertisement near the church shows the words “Porn and Pancakes” written in syrup on a stack of flapjacks.

Are we sure it’s syrup? That’s the question. 

I’ve always prayed for pancakes and porn and now my prayers have been answered! Hallejuh! Who wants to drive up to New York with me to join in on the fun?

When is Jenna going to be a guest speaker? I’ve heard her say “oh god” more than a few times.

The girl told investigators that Shields told her to perform five topless jumping jacks, which she said she did as he shone his flashlight on her.

I guess he was checking to make sure she didn’t have any concealed weapons? Yeah. That’s the ticket.

Shields was later fired and pleaded no contest to extortion. He was placed on probation for two years in December 2003 and ordered to write a letter of apology to the girl.

A letter of apology? I wonder what it said:

Dear Topless Girl,

I really enjoyed pulling you out of the car when you were making out with your boyfriend. I love when I pull over chicks who are topless. Wait. I was supposed to apologize for that. Um, it was a nice car you were in.

Can I see them again? Wait. Scratch that. Are you still seeing that loser you were with? If not. Call me.

Signed,

Perverted Officer.

It had an erection that lasted more than a week. I didn’t even know iguanas had anything to get an erection with. I thought they….well…I never really thought about how they reproduced. Eggs or something, I guess. Who spends time thinking about that?

So the owner takes the iguana to the vet, because, well who wants an iguana with 5 legs? The vet decides to remove the poor thing’s wang just in case. Poor creature.

But wait…there’s more….the iguana had 2 wangs!

Why didn’t the second one get the effects of Viagra too? I guess that’s a question for veternarians or Pfizer. Someone email them and ask, please. Those of us with 2 wangs need to know!

It also has a swimming pool (was this a shocker?), a home theatre, and will be fully furnished. Hmmm, $155 million AND I don’t have to visit Rooms to Go? Let me sell that Hyde Park apartment and I’m movin’. Sweet deal.

The previous most expensive home was sold for $139 million, but that was in England - next door to the 77 sqft apartment no doubt.  Donald Trump is selling a $125 million home in Palm Beach, Florida. I guess the days of houses less than a million dollars are going bye bye.

For $200,000 in this area,  you get nothing. For $100,000 you get places that should be condemned. Real estate prices are absolutely crazy these days. WTF is up with that?